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Hi, friend.
It’s true, I love a list.
I’ve started a new journaling practice. In the evening I don’t just write down my to-do list for the following day/s. Before I look forward, I look back.
I take a beat to reflect, noting the various ways in which I looked after myself that particular day. A “done list” is my new to-do list precursor.
I jot down the smallish stuff that I’ve been meaning to do. Such as:
+ used my S.A.D. light in the morning
+ fit in a quick MWH workout
+ called my Mom
+ sipped bone broth, hooray for collagen
+ exceeded my steps goal
+ submitted latest (final?!) book proposal draft to a literary agent
+ took my vitamins - allll of them
+ returned those ugly boots (I’m bad at e-commerce)
+ brought home big camellia branches to flower indoors
+ didn’t look at screens for an hour before bed
+ dry brushed to detox
+ reduced monthly banking fees
+ refilled humidifier at night instead of ignoring that it’s empty and waking up dry as the Sahara
Nothing here is winning me any awards. But in creating that list I think, “Dayum, I take pretty good care of myself.” I’m gifting myself a dopamine hit for being a good steward of my own person.
This is the opposite of goal setting. It’s a little victory lap, which then helps me stay motivated to keep going (and steer away from bad influences).
Try it out and let me know what you think. Your “done list” will look different than mine, of course. But I hope you’ll get a similar kick of satisfaction as you claim some small wins along the way to your big triumphs.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo Credit: Jennifer Saunders and Joanna Lumley exhibiting bad habits in “Absolutely Fabulous”
]]>Hi, friend.
There you are. It has been a hard day. Maybe a straight up U-G-L-Y kinda day. So you open a notebook and let all the emotion spill out on the page. You did good. Instead of pretending, “No, really everything is so great right now" (said shakily, an octave above your normal voice, while opening a bag from MedMen), you chose to support yourself via the written word. BRAVO.
Taking that step can be intimidating. One of the recurring barriers to journaling that comes up in workshops - and I hear them all - is the concern that by letting difficult emotions rise to the surface they will overwhelm you. You will be worse off for writing it down, not better.
But the opposite is what tends to occur. By naming the fears they usually do one of the following things (Bonus: some all-new journal prompts to help):
Journal Prompt: Organize your concerns by listing them out. That might be enough to help you ease back from the red zone, but keep going if you want to. Take each one and create a way to either counter or transform it. None of us are fixed points on a map, which means circumstances are dynamic. You’re a creative being, call in those superpowers to dream up solutions and opportunities.
Journal Prompt: Take 5 mindful breaths: in through your nose, out through your mouth - longer on the exhale. Now, consider where and how this set of circumstances can be your teacher. Focus less on The What and more on The Why.
Imagine someone who loves you very much witnessing you with tremendous wisdom and compassion. What would they say about the situation? Doesn’t need to be an actual person. What would your own personal Mr. Rogers want you to know? If it helps, imagine taking a walk with them. Write it all down.
Then I invite you to recognize that this voice, the one that just provided so much caring support, is actually resourced from within - and you can access it whenever you need some solace or guidance. How ‘bout them apples?
Still need support? That. Is. Okay.
You aren’t here on this Earth to try to manage all of life’s potholes on your own. I don’t know anyone who operates like that with prolonged success. Sometimes we need extra help. That resonate?
Case in point, when I was going through chemotherapy I didn’t want to have to explain how I was feeling to a vanilla therapist because I was so overwhelmed physiologically I could hardly name my own emotions. I wanted to talk with someone who was deeply familiar with the terrain, who could deconstruct this mind-fuck with expertise.
So I sought out a therapist who worked specifically with cancer patients. And it helped a lot. In the handful of sessions I had with her, I gained helpful clarity and perspective around my current circumstances. Did I also journal? Like it was my job (and this was long before it would kind of become my job), but I also got additional help.
Was I being a wuss? I’m pretty sure you’re going to say “no” to that question. So if you can have that level of compassion for me, I hope you’ll do the same for yourself.
Journal Prompt: What kind/s of support do you need to help you through your current obstacle? What people, places and things might help you gain clarity / feel better? What resources have helped you in the past? What new resources might you add to that portfolio?
Any and all of the above are going to serve you better than burying the boogeyman. Sure, there are times when you'll need to compartmentalize in order to get through the day. Some moments require us to set aside emotional concerns and perform. But that's a mentality reserved for once-in-a-while use, otherwise it starts to add up. Eventually a tab comes due, with interest. Instead, skip that sticker shock by giving yourself some grace in the form of mindfully wringing out your mental sponge on the page.
And that’s not just good for dealing with holiday stress, my friend. This wisdom is a different kind of evergreen.
If you or someone you care about could really use an emotional or creative outlet right about now, consider gifting an AllSwell Notebook/Deck combo. The upsides will far outlast any holiday family festivities.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo Credit: excerpt from my favorite Christmas movie, The Family Stone, written and directed by Thomas Bezucha
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Hi, friend.
How are you doing out there? I thought this might be a really (really) good time to provide some accessible actions to take good care of your mental and physiological well-being. Because when things get gnarly, don’t underestimate the power of going back to basics.
Gratitude journaling, with a kick. Have a look around your life and write down 3-10 things for which you are grateful and why. I find that the second part of this prompt transforms the activity into something deeply nourishing.
Step away from the data buffet. Take breaks from media consumption and screens in general. We’ve all been through **a lot** these past few years. Our nervous systems are still recuperating (or trying to) so please don’t overdo it. That won’t help anyone. Give it a rest, circle back to the news when you have the reserves to absorb and contemplate the information.
Find ways to sweat. Exercise to the point of schvitzing, pour yourself into a hot bath, go for a run, be a fast-walker, get into a sauna if you can. Our bodies are wise, mindfully let it release whatever it needs to.
Try a timed free-write. Give yourself a set amount of minutes, say 4-7, and write continuously. Get a good flow going, try to keep writing the entire time without picking the pen up off the paper. Turn on the tap, let the words stream out of you. Maybe rip up or burn those pages afterwards as a mini-ritual.
Be nice - to yourself. What makes you feel good? I’m not talking about vacationing in Ischia for 10 days. Think “within reach.” Make a list and then go do one or more items as a way of both shifting your mental state and exerting some autonomy. Heck, do them all.
Even the act of writing these things down can release a dose of feel-good chemicals into your body. Some of what’s on my list to help inspire your own…
Sun-gaze. Stare directly at the sun until you see spots. No, don’t do that. That’s a terrible idea. I was just making sure you were paying attention.
Be nice - to someone else. It’s easy to feel powerless in these times but you can make a positive difference today, here and now. Find ways to be of service to your community - be it a friend, your partner, a professional contact or family member, whoever. Might be something small. Not sure? Just ask.“Hey, how are you? How can I help?” Your inquiry might be medicine for the recipient. Or try out Letters of Love, which is one of my favorite moments of the week.
Give some of these foundational practices a go and let me know how they work for you. And a common sense reminder: If there’s anything I can do to support your journaling practice, please reach out.
In Swellness,
Laura
Hi friend,
August is my no-rush zone. A month without hurrying, that’s been the goal. (Which is why you’re getting this newsletter deep into August. Over here walking the talk.)
Origin story. In July, I was on my way to see my mother in Northwestern Connecticut, a trip that requires three ferries and a bunch of road time. I usually enjoy the ride but due to seasonal traffic and roadwork, each leg of the trip took longer than expected.
The cumulative result was me barreling down the road with spiked blood pressure like my hair was on fire in a futile effort to make my ticketed departure time, which I missed - in BOTH directions.
Things happen, so be it. But as I sat in line, twitching for 90ish minutes with no signal, waiting for the next boat that I could maybe eek my way onto, I said to myself, “Ok, enough. Hello, teachable moment.” I’d been running hard for about 9 months between global travel and a cross-country move, and it was time to slow myself down, literally and figuratively.
But did I even know how?
Going slowly has been woefully out of favor in our dopamine-pellet age of “more-now,” but deviating from my chronically over-scheduled ways (fellow entrepreneurs, I know you feel me), had become necessary.
I “teach” what I need to learn, so I channeled my line of inquiry and research into a journaling workshop (which was covered by The New York Times) titled…
The Long Way Home:
Going Slow
And it felt good. Really good. A few of the things I’ve learned in the process:
Taking your time isn’t the same as being indecisive. Poet and essayist Mark Van Doren counseled, “Slowly, slowly wisdom gathers.” Damn straight.
The space between occurrence and response is one of the most important in our lives. Giving it a beat will only increase the quality of our interactions.
In this age of click-bait punditry where everyone seems to have an instant opinion about everything, we are allowed to come to a conclusion when we know more.
Saying “I don’t know yet” rather than stating an opinion that isn’t fully baked is a demonstration of wisdom, not a lack of leadership.
When you’re not rushing there’s more room between points A and B, so you’ll likely spend more time in the in-between. These liminal spaces can feel uncomfortable because they’re not defined, but there’s a huge amount of creative opportunity and freedom in the unknown.
Despite our current Amazon Prime levels of micro-patience, there is no finish line and faster doesn’t always equal better. This is not a race. And slow is actually pretty darn sexy.
Happy August, my friends. I hope you’ll experiment with ways to slow down and savor the rest of the summer. Take your time. That’s right - your time is yours, so take it.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo Credit: Joni Mitchel by Norman Seeff
Image Credit: Cochineal Marfa, Graceland, Girls! Girls! Girls!, Elvis Presley, 1962, Audiobooks
Hi, friend.
Just in time for summer explorations, here’s Into it: the roadtrip edition.
I have driven across the country twice in 10 months. Just me, a dear friend and my pup. In fact, we had so much fun the first time we decided to take the same ethos of keeping a loose itinerary and bring it to a different, southern route. Sharing some of the highlights we encountered along the way.
And of course, nothing feels as good after a long trip than coming back to your own bed. Especially when it’s dressed in buttery Coyuchi bedding. That was one sweet homecoming!
Image Credit: Laura Rubin
Here we are at White Sands, tongues out, agog at these otherworldly dunes of powder-fine gypsum in the middle of New Mexico. 275 square miles of them, to be exact. It was deliciously quiet, like the volume knob on life had been turned way down. And the sand is so soft you can climb the dunes barefoot. Apparently this is also where the Boyz II Men video for “Water Runs Dry” was shot. So be careful otherwise you’ll have that song stuck in your head halfway to Marfa.
Photo credit: Cochineal Marfa
I’m not sure I'm ready for Texan wine but I ate antelope steak for the first time at this locally-sourced restaurant and it was delicious. My friend is a pescetarian and she also found plenty of good things to enjoy at this buzzy and beautiful spot, helmed by James Beard Semi-Finalist Executive Chef Alexandra Gates. Plus their cocktails are top notch. Go see Gabriel at the bar and tell him I sent you.
Photo credit: Laura Rubin
It turns out Elvis was a design-head, actively involved in the interiors of Graceland, which were updated frequently. Touring the house itself was brilliant - and actually much more moving than I expected especially seeing private home movies of a young, fit father with his bride and child, knowing it would all go so terribly awry. But it was Elvis' immense car collection and airplanes that really stole the show. 24 carat gold seatbelt buckles on his plane (the Lisa Marie). Custom citrus-hued leather seats on his jet. Elvis wasn’t afraid of color - from a bright yellow Scout to Cadillacs in pink and purple and beyond, he had nearly the full Crayola box covered. Pro tip: Check out Central BBQ while you’re in Memphis for some slow-smoked deliciousness.
Photo credit: Eva Blue
At some point you feel like you’ve listened to every Podcast known to man, every playlist ever created - and high literature isn’t going to cut it. You need something that is going to help you not just pass the time, but laugh your way to Texarkana. Enter the talented and hilarious Samantha Irby. Favorite chapter: Irby dispensing advice on how to navigate friendships with former drinking buddies who are now suburban moms (hang in there for the Costco loot!).
Photo credit: Trina Yin
We stayed at some pretty basic spots along the way. As my companion pointed out, it would be a waste because we were only sleeping at these “accommodations” (I don’t think they quite merit the term hotel). So that first night in my own bed I did a swan dive into the swaddling comfort of premium, organic Coyuchi linens. The good folks at Coyuchi asked me to pen a blog post about getting the most out of a pen to paper practice (AM / PM) from the comfort of your bed, which you can read here. Added bonus: Treat yourself to some of their exquisiteness and use code “LAURALRUBINIG” for 15% off.
]]> Photo Credit: Nick Cave, Soundsuit, 2009. Mixed Media,
Birmingham Museum of Art
Hello, friend.
Photo credit: Carly Earl/The Guardian
There are a lot of gems in this discussion with Chicago-based artist and educator Nick Cave. Among them Cave says of his process: “I never know what’s going to sort of trigger, and push me further down the road as I need to go. But those are the moments that set the bar, that sort of move us forward.” I particularly appreciated the perspective that our triggers, the moments that could pull us down, can also fuel our creativity. We don’t always get to choose what happens to or around us, but we can choose what we do with it.
Photo credit: Justine Bateman
To be young, famous and beautiful. Might sound great but everyone ages and when you’re doing it publicly as a woman it comes with its own particular burdens. That’s the starting point for Justine Bateman’s fearlessly written book. Her personal distaste for making any surgical adjustments to her own face as she got older, despite being in an industry - and a culture - that asks women to “maintain” a lineless face into their 60’s, is a refreshing and not often-stated perspective. She reminds us: #TheresNothingWrongWithYourFace.
Photo credit: Bridgeman Images
If I had an infinite art budget (I don’t), I would own a painting or three by Lucien Freud. It has so much less to do with what’s depicted than the way he works. That is some seriously sexy brushwork. This short, articulately narrated video is about Freud painting another old geezer at the very tip-top of his artistic game, David Hockney. Apparently they had an epic rapport. To be a fly on the wall. Age does not diminish talent - or relevance.
Photo credit: Donna Trope
Aforementioned Lucien Freud painted the subject of this podcast, enigmatic model Kate Moss. Moss was rather famously reticent about giving interviews at the height of her fame so this was the first time I’d heard her speak. It was interesting to note how different the voice I expected was from what Moss actually sounds like. Made me think about how silence allows the public to project its fantasies, for better or worse. In this digital age silence is certainly a rarity, and sometimes saying nothing is the most elegant response of all.
Photo credit: Canongate Books
We’re both from the tri-state area, live in Malibu and have the same last name. With the publication of this book on creativity - subject matter I swim in - a lot of people have recently asked me if we’re related. Not to my knowledge. Maybe mega-successful music producer Rick Rubin and I are loooooong lost cousins of a kind? Either way, I really enjoy this book. I use present tense because I like to revisit it and dive in at random spots for a quick hit. It delivers clear and succinct doses of inspiration for your own creative output, whatever shapes that may take. I even sent it to my niece (a talented painter) as a gift. Plus, can we have a round of applause for the gorgeous, jacket-less book design?
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Hello, friend.
As human beings we can simultaneously have multiple - and seemingly opposing - emotional experiences. We can be grateful for one dynamic while grieving another. We can be both excited and nervous at the same time. Even great news can take some getting used to.
For example - a positive change, one that we planned towards and hoped for, may come with a mixed bag of emotions.
Photo Credit: The Path
Hello, friend.
Photo credit: Trina Yin
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Photo credit: Leonard Cohen, 2008. WIKIMEDIA COMMONS, LICENSED UNDER CCO 2.0
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Photo Credit: Christa Funk
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Photo Credit: Still from the film “Singles,” 1992
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Photo Credit: film still Amadeur (1984)
Hello, friend.
"Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know it's normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through..”
Photo Credit: Julie Verhoeven
Hello, friend.
"Those with a healthy self-esteem believe they are worthy and competent, and strive for intimate, meaningful connections with others, but do not necessarily see themselves as superior to others. In contrast, narcissists think they are superior to others, but they don't necessarily view themselves as worthy.”
Photo credit: Alessandra Olanow
“Hello, Grief: I’ll be right with you.”
I’ve been fortunate to collaborate with wildly talented illustrator and graphic artist Alessandra Olanow on multiple projects for AllSwell - including the first 2 AllSwell notebooks. She even hand-drew the wave in our logo (the very same one I have tattooed on my foot). Alex’s latest project is a poignant and beautiful book about her personal grief journey after losing her mother. This book is balm for the soul, offering advice, inspiration, and solace for all of us in the club of grief.
Photo credit: Lisa Love and Kimlet Gordon for Citizens of Humanity
I’m not anti-aging, I just want to do it as well as possible. And this article delivered some welcome news: that scientifically-speaking we tend to be happier when we’re older. I’m on board for that program, particularly that getting older + better is terrain I cover in “Since You Asked.”
I’m not exactly going full #dryjanuary this year, more like…damp January. Making choices mindfully. Sometimes I like a cocktail when I write at night but it doesn’t always serve me. I recently road-tested their newest hit, a not-negroni and it did the trick. All upside, no downside. If you like a wind-down ritual but don’t want to imbibe alcohol, give Little Saints a try. And cheers to trying new things this year! PS: If you’re keen to give Little Saints a shot, use code “DAMPJAN” for a cheeky 15% discount.
Photo Credit: Monsieur Plant
Lesser known facts I learned listening to this engrossing podcast with Thom Yorke, the frontman of Radiohead: Thom decided on his career at the age of seven, when he lay on the floor between large speakers at a friend’s house and listened to Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody. He made his own electric guitar when he was 10, and wrote his first song at 11. But it was his acknowledgment of his own former boorish behavior that stopped me in my literal tracks. He owned it, apologized for it and has grown past it. Now that’s self-esteem versus narcissism in practice.
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Image Credit: Ali MacGraw photographed by Pamela Hanson
Hi, friend.
Speaking of the MOJO Series, it was such a big hit this fall I’m running it again in January. If you’re looking for a refreshing slingshot into the new year, here’s where to start. Space is limited so if it speaks to you, come join. Hit me up with any questions.
In Swellness,
Image Credit: Javier Arcenillas
“Seeing the Generative Story of Our Time”
Sometimes I find Krista Tippett to be unappealingly earnest. But I actually felt my body unclench in ways I didn’t even realize it was tense as I listened to this short podcast. It’s a rare thing these days to find a new way of looking at current events that provides a positive framework. Here’s one.
Image Credit: Coveteur
It cannot be overstated that the events of the past few years haven’t been normal. And if, like me, you are marveling at the speed with which the world has resumed its business-as-usual expectations, you might understandably be a bit creatively stymied. This article wisely posits the medicine we need is right there in the work.
Image Credit: Symbiome
Okay, so this isn’t “nutritious brain food” but it’s definitely face food. Skin food? Both. This is my hero product. I recently ran into a friend who said I was glowing (no, I’m not pregnant). And when I was traveling this Fall I kept getting compliments on my “dewy skin” despite a schedule that should’ve had me looking haggard. So if you want to save face, I recommend you give The Answer a shot. Plus the nice people at Symbiome are offering a 15% discount when you use code LAURA15. Now it’s a party.
Photo Credit: Morgan Talty
A good short story is a wonder. Set in a Native community in Maine, these bittersweet, smart and very funny short stories by Morgan Talty kept me company over Thanksgiving. It felt appropriate to be reading a Native American writer sharing tales of what it means to be Penobscot in the twenty-first century. Check it out.
Image Credit: Ashley Vee
Whether or not the headline is true, one thing I celebrated while reading this pleasingly acerbic article was its shout out for longer form writing (AKA Substack). A few months ago I said, “I don’t care if brevity is the marketing flavor of the month. I’m going to use as many words as I need to express an idea.” And that’s why you’ve been hearing more from me in your in-box. Because not all concepts are meant to be encapsulated in a caption.
Here we are, folks. The Holidays, with all their joys and challenges. It’s pretty easy to get lost in the fray, for our grounding practices to become less consistent. As we kick off the season, I wanted to check in and help set the tone for the coming days.
My equivalent of a holiday journaling workshop is what I call “The Season of Gratitude,” as a way of staying focused on what’s real, what matters. Note: You will not get a Black Friday sale email from me. Nor on Cyber-Monday or any of the other breathless, consumption-driving markers. But if you would like to explore what an uplifting holiday / end of year / New Year vision-setting workshop looks like, please reach out. It would be my pleasure to co-create a supportive experience for your professional / personal community or brand.
A gratitude practice is something you hear a lot about in the context of journaling. And rightly so. Gratitude is a life-hack, a super-power of sorts. It can help you retrain your brain to become a more positive person.
How? Let’s take something as trivial and old-school as the game of Tetris. In what’s called “the Tetris effect,” the video game has been known to have a scientifically measurable impact on people’s brains and even invade their dreams. Similarly, the effect of practicing and retaining a more positive thinking pattern has a powerful upside. Over the past two decades studies have consistently found that people who practice gratitude report fewer symptoms of illness, more optimism and happiness, stronger relationships, and more generous behavior among other benefits.
And hell yeah, that’s great. But when I contemplate a typical gratitude practice it actually seems fairly self-centered. Yes, you’re being grateful on the page and that benefits you, but it ends there. Ok, what next? Who else?
“Thanksgiving” is a compound word. It contains “thanks” (we got that part) and, oh hey, giving. It’s good to be thankful. Just like it’s great to write down things you appreciate in your journal. But then go further - now, give it away. Help your gratitude grow some feet and go out into the world. Need help? I created the cheeky AllSwell postcard packs with Terrapin Stationers as an analog extension of your journal, as a way to connect.
Via whatever means, try writing a simple note of thanks to someone that has positively impacted you and your life. Not for something transactional, like a present. This isn’t a thank you card to Aunt Irene for the birthday check for fifty bucks. A simple kindness, a moment that mattered, a way of being that shed light in the dark. These are the subtle but important things that might otherwise go unsaid, un-honored.
This doesn’t have to be an exhaustive letter. No need to get bogged down, a few sentences will do. Add a stamp, off it goes. And just wait to see what comes back your way. It tends to be pretty wonderful. As the wise Anne Lamott writes in Help Thanks Wow: The Three Essential Prayers:
“Gratitude begins in our hearts and then dovetails into behavior. It almost always makes you willing to be of service, which is where the joy resides. It means that you are willing to stop being such a jerk. When you are aware of all that has been given to you, in your lifetime and the past few days, it is hard not to be humbled, and pleased to give back.”
Thank you for being part of the magic that is AllSwell, for helping to spread the good word about putting pen-to-paper, and furthering the journaling revolution. You are my ambassadors, my friends, my co-conspirators. I’m thankful for each and every one of you.
In Swellness,
Laura
Image Credit: Red Hot Chili Peppers
]]>Hi, friend.
I consider myself a girl’s girl to my core. I unequivocally have my girlfriends’ backs. Nonetheless, to-date my status as a “groomsmaid” outpaces my tenure as a bridesmaid.
What does that mean? I’ve been the sole female representation in the groom’s party, asked by multiple male friends to stand up with them before their community and whatever kind of god they believe in when they’ve said “I do” to the woman of their dreams. (And it’s not as if I’m the token tomboy in a crew of dudes. This has been for guys that don’t even know each other. Go figure.)
The groomsmaid dynamic is an a-typical role in this culture - the female platonic best friend to a hetero male. Far from being a rom-com set up, it’s a privilege. Here’s why: When things go south - and I mean get really bad - I’m often the person they turn to.
You name it, I’ve heard it. Inky-black depression, shame spirals related to loss of income, intense OCD fixations, breakdowns caused by breakups, suicidal ideation, full-blown anxiety attacks and more. All sorts of arduous emotional terrain.
But the stunning thing is that I’m often the only one they tell. Maybe their mother, too. But that’s pretty much it. Not their male friends, not their wives or girlfriends, certainly not their colleagues or mentors. Why? Because they feel their suffering would be perceived as irrevocable weakness, something they absolutely cannot afford. Their identity cannot accommodate their own suffering.
Which brings me to AllSwell. Ten plus years ago I was working predominantly in action sports. Between privately bearing witness to searing male pain, and the toxic, cartoonish bro-ism I was seeing at work, it was clear these guys needed an outlet for releasing and processing their emotions. Like, for instance, a journal.
At that time journaling was most frequently (and inaccurately) considered a diversion for emo teen girls. But I knew how radically transformative and supportive putting pen to paper could be because of my own journey. When I was ideating AllSwell my goal was to build a tent big enough for everyone to come on in, including the guys. When I dove into research mode I discovered just how beneficial journaling could be for the emotional and mental well-being of men. (Read more about that here.)
I’ve been actively spreading the good word ever since. While I can’t personally show up for all the men out there privately enduring pain and wanting more for themselves, I can help them find their way to a notebook - which has been scientifically proven to help.
Enter Mathew McConaughey, who pretty much embodies the prototypical dude archetype. No fewer than a dozen people forwarded this video to me in which he recently told guys to put pen to paper as a tool for becoming a better man. Hallelujah, amen! Here it was, peer to peer affirmation. Finally.
Now, I recognize that it isn’t fashionable to be helping out hetero guys these days. But hear me out. This is about supporting the collective. If a man is mentally unwell, suppressing dark emotions, it’s probably going to effect everyone around them. They’re more likely to be jerks (or worse) to their partner, their children, their colleagues, their managers, their neighbors, random people they interact with, etc. The flipside? If they’re emotionally fit, they’re probably not going to wreak as much havoc on the rest of us. It’s better for everyone.
So if you love a man - be it your son, brother, husband, lover, friend - encourage him to journal. It’s great if you want to make it an AllSwell notebook, but it doesn't have to be. Maybe get him The Deck of prompts so he knows where to start, how to use the deceptively simple and revolutionary technology of pen and paper. Heck, get him a 1:1 creative coaching session if you really want to help him out. As a bonafide groomsmaid, I’m a safe haven.
And if you’re reading this as a man in emotional pain, please don’t suffer alone. Reach out, even if you don’t quite know what you need. We’ll get you networked into some support. It’s a demonstration of strength because you’re not just looking out for yourself, you’re protecting all those around you.
Take good care of each other out there…
In Swellness,
Laura
Bro journaling. Is there such a thing? I’m saying yes, let’s make it a thing. There is so much cultural shame bound up in depression for men that it often becomes compounded by the experience of going through it alone. Some of the guys dearest to me have suffered in near silence during emotionally difficult times. I could see something wasn’t quite right but had to break down entrenched barriers to get them to communicate with me and expose just how emotionally dire it was for them. That’s why this study on the positive effects of journaling related to gender hit me like a thunderbolt.
]]>Hi, friend.
Bro journaling. Is there such a thing? I’m saying yes, let’s make it a thing.
There is so much cultural shame bound up in depression for men that it often becomes compounded by the experience of going through it alone. Some of the guys dearest to me have suffered in near silence during emotionally difficult times. I could see something wasn’t quite right but had to break down entrenched barriers to get them to communicate with me and expose just how emotionally dire things were.
That’s why this study on the positive effects of journaling related to gender hit me like a thunderbolt. My main takeaway:
“According to Lieberman [a psychologist at UCLA], men seemed to benefit from writing about their feelings more so than women, and writing by hand seemed to have a bigger effect than typing on a keyboard. That’s an interesting note: could men benefit from journaling more because in general they tend to keep their feelings to themselves? A journal can certainly act as a safe space for emotionally deprived men to vent.”
As a woman I easily (over)share with my closest friends. It isn’t unusual for us to reach out to one another when we are having a tough time. But men often don’t have that luxury. They don’t have as much of an opportunity to work through their feelings, prevented by a mix of stigma and stunted habits.
That’s why I’m particularly proud to be sharing our conversation with #AllSwellMuse, climber and “motorcycle dirtbag” Sterling Pierce Taylor on masculine self-expression and overcoming fear. There are few things more thoroughly bad-ass than free soloing. No stranger to this pursuit, Sterling talks candidly about the current state of men finding outlets for creativity and emotion.
Bring on the rugged journaling. Turn your dearest dudes on to the experience of putting pen to paper. It’s a powerful and dignified act, and it just might save someone you love from unnecessary suffering.
I hope you enjoy reading Sterling’s interview, as well as a slew of other inspiring gems in this latest AllSwell Reads.
In Swellness,
Laura
Why He Kayaked Across The Atlantic At 70, New York Times
When Aleksander Doba kayaked into the port in Le Conquet, France, on Sept. 3, 2017, he had just completed his third — and by far most dangerous — solo trans-Atlantic kayak trip. He was a few days shy of his 71st birthday. He was unaccustomed to wearing pants. He’d been at sea 110 days, alone, having last touched land that May at New Jersey’s Barnegat Bay. The trip could have easily ended five days earlier, when Doba was just a few hundred feet off the British coast. But he had promised himself, when he left New Jersey, that he would kayak not just to Europe but to the Continent proper. Read the full story above.
In Focus: David LaChapelle, Nowness
In 1980, at just 17 years old, now iconic American photographer David LaChapelle left his rural North Carolina home for New York, which would lead to a meeting with none other than Andy Warhol. The established artist hired LaChapelle immediately as a photographer for his celebrated magazine, Interview. Warhol reportedly told LaChapelle: "Do whatever you want. Just make sure everybody looks good." In this mini-doc the emblematic image-maker reflects on kitsch and spiritual matters from his remote Hawaiian home. Watch at the link up top.
Peggy Guggenheim’s Great Grandson Has Opened an Art Gallery in a Tulum Treehouse, Culture Trip
When a Guggenheim opens a gallery, the world listens. Gallerist and art advisor Santiago Rumney-Guggenheim has done just that in Tulum, making the town a new force to be reckoned with on the contemporary art scene. The gallery promises to showcase an impressive roster of contemporary artists and to foster creativity at Azulik in the Yucatán Peninsula. It’s also located in a treehouse, meaning curved walls, and has a no shoe policy. Interesting, right? Read more at the link up top.
Why Analogue Design Still Endures, BBC
In a world where digital interfaces, devices, and processes are ubiquitous and immensely powerful, analogue ideas and methods are enjoying a resilience precisely because of what they, uniquely, can accomplish. It can be as simple as paper and pen, paint and canvas, modeling clay or balsa wood, or simple electronics and motors to convey an idea. There is a reason why every creative worker and aspiring startup titan working in a coffee shop can usually be found toting a journal next to their laptop and phone. Learn more at the link above.
A Group Of People With An Amphibious Life Have Evolved Traits to Match, The Economist
The Bajau, a people of the Malay Archipelago, spend almost all of their lives at sea. They live either on boats or in huts perched on stilts on shallow reefs, and they migrate from place to place in flotillas that carry entire clans. They survive on a diet composed almost entirely of seafood. And to gather this they spend 60% of their working day underwater. They sometimes descend more than 70 metres, and can stay submerged for up to five minutes. Many researchers have speculated that they carry genetic traits which adapt them to their remarkable lifestyle. Now, as they report in Cell, Melissa Ilardo and Rasmus Nielsen of the University of California, Berkeley have shown that this is so. Read on at the link up top.
Sterling Pierce Taylor on Masculine Self-Expression and Fear
A self described adventurer and motorcycle dirtbag, Sterling Pierce Taylor is no average dude. With a fear of heights, this adrenaline junkie pushes himself up rock faces all across the US, looking fear dead in the face. Needless to say, he loves challenges - and his motorcycle. Sterling is on a yearlong motorcycle trek of the US, climbing as many cliffs and mountainsides as possible, an AllSwell notebook never far from his side. Get to know Sterling and his key to tackling fear and masculine self-expression above.
]]>Hi, friend.
If you signed up for this newsletter (and you’re taking the time to read it), you’re clearly a thoughtful, clever human. So you probably already know that bigger isn’t always better - and I stand by that philosophy when it comes to journaling.
To that point, as much as I respect journaling maven Julia Cameron’s book “The Artist’s Way,” her expectation that we produce three full pages of free-writing every day before doing anything else just isn’t attainable for most of us, particularly given how our minds have adapted to the digital age. Plus, sometimes it’s helpful to have a prompt (which is why I created The Deck).
We are playing catch up with the firehose of new digital demands. The number of distractions has sky-rocketed while our attention span has diminished. So, I predicated AllSwell on meeting people where they are and building from there.
After attending an AllSwell workshop I led last summer, Megan Klein (founder of Little Saints) pointed out that my approach is like “microdosing journaling.” I laughed and nodded in recognition. Almost like a homeopathic dose, in workshops I often introduce mindful writing activities that are just a few minutes long. Why? In part because they tap into the good stuff without overburdening you.
Thank you for reading. And as always, let me know if there’s anything I can do to support your journey.
In Swellness,
Laura
PS: If some of the vocabulary I used above isn’t familiar to you, here’s a place to get oriented. And to be clear, I’m by no means suggesting that the use of psychedelics is beneficial for all. But journaling is.
Image Credit: Daniel Kramer
Hey, friend.
It happened in Cleveland. I thought I knew but I didn’t know. I conceptually understood that much of the music that fuels our personal soundtracks originated in the pages of journals, but it wasn’t until I was standing in front of a display of notebooks with lyrics scrawled in them at the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame that I viscerally got it.
At the time I was driving cross-country from Maine to Malibu with a dear friend and my dog. Our exact route was somewhat loose but we’d agreed that wherever we stopped along the way we’d do something unique to that location, a random activity that we wouldn’t have done otherwise. So there we were in Ohio with a couple of hours to kill and the museum was calling. While my floppy puppy was at a much needed groomer visit, we paid for tickets and had a wander. I didn’t expect it to be a profound experience, but you never know where lightning bolts are going to find you.
Checking out the exhibits of memorabilia - amidst Greg Allman’s Hammond organ, Alice Cooper’s leopard-print high-heeled boots, the very first Talking Heads T-Shirt and John Lee Hooker’s guitar - were words scrawled on paper with what looked like varying degrees of urgency. Like stars that fell from the sky, it shocked and amazed me to see handwritten language that would become anthems sung aloud in arenas. It all began here, jotted down in cheap spiral notebooks, on yellow legal paper and multiple pages of hotel notepads (the kind placed by a phone).
From Thom Yorke to Stevie Nicks and beyond, the songs that we know by heart - the ones that exalt and comfort us - all started with simple tools: pen and paper. Angus Young, Billy Joel, Jackson Browne, Randy Newman, Patti Smith, Bob Dylan and so many more recording artists whose lyrics are woven into our memories use the act of writing down their thoughts as an inherent part of their process.
I’m no lyricist, and I’m not suggesting that each time we crack a notebook we’re one step closer to writing a hit song. On the contrary, the act of putting pen to paper is intended to be just for you. Maybe you’ll choose to share a piece of it with the world like Taylor Swift, but that’s not the point. It’s the act of doing it that provides the mental, emotional and physiological benefits.
And you’re in very good company. Rockstar company. So if you ever find yourself internally discrediting your journaling practice as frivolous or fey, remember it’s what fuels booty-shaking dance parties, ecstatic concerts, and all those tracks we sing aloud with the windows down. My friend and I sure put this knowledge to good use on our westward road trip.
You can also use music as a way to freshen or deepen your journaling practice. Curious? Check out some ideas here:
I get it, sometimes a blank page can be intimidating. Not sure where to start or what to write about? Or maybe you want to stretch your writing practice in a new direction rather than doing the same-same? A prompt can help. You can tap The Deck (AllSwell’s deck of 52 write/draw journaling prompt cards), and you can also use a song as a way to inspire your own writing:
Sticking with the theme, in this AllSwell Roundup I’ve gathered a handful of music-related resources that have gotten my wheels turning (and feet moving) lately. Dive in and enjoy, no mosh pit required.
And if you’re not feeling much like a rockstar these days, it’s not too late to sign up for the MOJO Series, 4 weekly digital workshops kicking off with me on Wednesday, October 19th. There are just a couple spots left so if you need your pilot light turned up, here’s your shot.
In Swellness,
Laura
Image Credit: Jem Stone, via Wikimedia Commons. Licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0.
Terrance Hayes’s Soundtracks for Most Any Occasion
The Paris Review asked poet Terrance Hayes to make a playlist for their readers and it’s a damn good one. Many of Hayes’s poems derive their titles from song names and lyrics; others are influenced by the mood of a particular album or track. Music, he says, “changes the air in the room,” to which I nod my head in agreement.
Image Credit: Khruangbin
Khruangbin - "So We Won't Forget"
Khruangbin is my go-to for music to journal by. (If that’s not a category on Spotify yet, it should be.) I really enjoy the entirety of Song Exploder - and their sister podcast Book Exploder hosted by Susan Orlean is pretty rad, too. I picked this specific episode for you because in it you hear how their bassist, Laura Lee, found her way to journaling and the ways that has influenced Khruangbin’s music.
Image Credit: Aristos Marcopoulos/PRNewsFoto/Legacy Recordings via AP Images
A Tribe Called Quest-"Scenario"
As a native New Yorker and child of the 90’s I’m an unapologetic East Coast hip-hop girl. And there are few acts that express that era better than A Tribe Called Quest. The whole podcast series is a fun ride, but this episode dedicated to Tribe’s cut “Scenario” will either bring back a whole slew of memories or offer up a musical education. Co-created by a posse, listen in and hear how greatness is made in a group setting.
Photo Credit: Tom Kelley
Bowie's Bookshelf: The Hundred Books That Changed David Bowie's Life
To me it always feels slightly pervy to check out someone’s bookshelves. It’s such an intimate peek, like looking through their lingerie drawer. And here Bowie opens his robe to share what books most influenced him. Plus, rockstars read. Here’s proof. So if you wanna channel some Bowie vibes, dive in.
Image Credit: Inez van Lamsweerde and Vinoodh Matadin
How Björk broke the sound barrier
I rarely cite two resources in a newsletter from the same outlet but the Björk episode of Song Exploder is so immensely moving that I decided to break my own rule to share it with you. Björk’s description of her creative process - not just how she works but why she chooses to take risks - is coupled with the lush track, Stonemilker, dripping with auditory beauty. I’ve listened to this episode multiple times and it never fails to result in chills. The good kind.
]]>Hi, friend.
The other day I had a 1:1 creative coaching session scheduled with a client. She reached out about 30 minutes in advance of our start time in tears, letting me know she was in the midst of a breakup breakdown, asking if we should reschedule. I gently suggested that this would be the perfect time for us to spend an hour together. And we did.
Over the past 9 years since establishing AllSwell I’ve exerted a lot of energy talking about non-traditional uses for journaling - for greater productivity, creativity, as a tool for better communication in a business setting, for heightened performance as an athlete, and more. I’m eager to challenge the prevailing norms, move journaling away from its angsty associations towards a more scientific approach so that it can meet more people where they are. But at the end of the day, your notebook is very much there for you whenever you need it, including at the nadir of a heartbreak.
Back to my client. We spent the hour talking through the neural and chemical reasons why breakups are so hard. Understanding that dynamic doesn’t necessarily diminish the heartache, but I find it can reframe it. We set her up with some activities to support her through the coming days and did some of these writing exercises in real time together. In case this reaches you (or someone you care about) in the midst of a similar crux I’m offering up some pen to paper prescriptions to heal a heart…
Long-form anguish outlet. The little black dress of journaling, a classic approach. Just write and write and write your heart out. Drop off all the baggage on the page. You may or may not feel immediately “lighter” for having done it, but this is immensely healthy for your long-term well-being. You can process here, say the unsayable. And hey, maybe you wanna rip those pages out and straight up burn them? Be safe in the process but it’s pretty satisfying to watch all that melt away into ether. Buh-byeeee!
One way streets can be your friend. Step away from your keyboard. Channel your emotions into a letter in your notebook instead - one you may or may not share. This is infinitely better than texting the object of your broken affections multiple paragraphs in the middle of the night. Put down the phone, crack a journal and let it rip. Trust me, this is vastly more dignified than offering up half-digested thoughts and feelings to someone who may or may not appreciate them. No vulnerability hangover, you’re taking good care of your own heart.
Get organized. Maybe there are things to say that will help provide meaningful closure. Instead of an unedited firehose approach, write your thoughts down. Get clear on the page. Then share that perspective with your former partner in whatever way/s are most appropriate - in writing, in person over the phone, etc.. But by writing it all down FIRST you’re more likely to have a productive and healing dialogue. You give yourself the chance to regain some clarity around your own narrative.
You rock. When was the last time you claimed your amazingness? A relationship rupture can feel like rejection but not all unions are built to last. Apparently this person isn’t your person for the long-haul. Okay, so be it. Doesn’t mean you’re not loveable (Spoiler Alert: you are loveable). Write down things every day that you appreciate about yourself. They can be big and small. Triple down on self-worth. Start noticing when you veer into negative self talk and when that happens, go back to the list of your awesomeness. This isn’t “I'm fluent in 6 languages and have abs you can bounce a quarter off of” territory. If that’s you, god bless. It sure isn’t me. Hey, maybe you make a damn fine cup of coffee, you parallel park like a boss, you’re a really good listener, you have hand-model hands, whatever! And keep adding to that list on an ongoing basis.
Do dopamine push ups. One of the reasons why breakups are so hard is that romance provides us with an I.V. drip of feel-good chemicals. Whether or not the union was as great as the promise it held, we’re letting go of both companionship and its fantasy. With all that streaming out of your system one of the best ways to build stairs out of the hole is to ideate other things that provide good vibes. (No, I’m not talking about breakup sex.). Make a plan, create a list of things for you to do and then go do them. (BTW: This works any time, not just when you’re going through a heart-mend.) I’ve included some scientifically-proven examples to get you inspired.
Be grateful. You may feel completely heart-sick but there is always something for which to be grateful, and by focusing your attention in that space you’re helping your brain to counter sadness. Over time a gratitude practice actually increases your baseline happiness setting. If you’re having a hard time thinking of things, get granular. Use all 5 senses: What sights, sounds, tastes, textures and scents can you call up that ring your pleasure center bells? (And no, this is not the place to include anything about your ex. Let’s set our sights in different directions.)
Help someone. This might sound counterintuitive, but the best way I’ve found to feel better in the midst of really lousy times is to help someone else. Write down ways in which you can be of service and go be useful. Spend a little time thinking about (and supporting) someone other than yourself and be amazed at how much better you feel because we’re wired to feel good when we help others. Not sure where to start? One of my go-to’s is Letters of Love.
Is there a magical light switch? Nope. When it comes to heartbreak there’s no way out but through, and pretty much everyone on this planet has felt some version of what you’re feeling right now. That said, with the help of your notebook you can make it to the other side more swiftly, with a lot more grace, new-found self-worth, and an outlook that will have you poised to make good decisions in the future. Because the longest standing relationship you’re going to have in your life is the one you’re already in - with yourself.
Want to support yourself or a friend through this process? Get yourself a freshie and The Deck of journaling prompts, forward this newsletter, invest in a 1:1 creative coaching session to help write your way to feeling better, learning and growing from the experience. Because I believe that’s what we’re all here to do, and sometimes our greatest opportunities come in the lousiest packages. If you wanna really go next level, then join the MOJO series to slingshot your way to a fresh start.
As always, let me know your thoughts and if you need more backup, I’m here for you. And congratulations on reading all the way to the end of our longest newsletter to-date. Here’s a discount code (discount code: “attentionspan” for 10% off AllSwell experiences and products good through October 12th, 2022) to say thanks for your time!
In Swellness,
Laura
Image Credit: Angela Basset in Waiting to Exhale
]]>Photo Credit: Artwork by Banksy, London, 2015
Hey, friend.
Welcome to The Attention Economy. Our attention is being bought and sold as a commodity. We are deluged with media content/advertising Frankenstein-style hybrids such as advertainment, shoptainment, gamification and embedded commerce. And it’s nearly everywhere. At the gas pump, in bathroom stalls, in bed (wherever you bring your phone). Sure, sometimes it’s diverting but it has a cost. As a result we are in a near-constant state of react & respond.
All of this is designed to get us to focus on and interact with messaging, to respond to their “call to action” - rather than being quiet enough to connect with our own autonomous voice.
I urge you to consider…what would you think about if all of this noise wasn’t telling you what to think about? What dreams could emerge out of that deliciously empty space? What questions would you ask? What calls to action would you come up with for yourself?
Your journal is a potent ally in this process. Turn your phone on airplane mode. Give yourself the gift of being present and write or draw. Nothing to do other than just putting a pen on a page. It’s not about productivity, it’s about presence.
Maybe even let yourself be bored for a minute or two. Boredom is an incredibly rare luxury these days out of which creativity can emerge. It’s a vacuum where ideas are born. Don’t quelch it with the drug of social media. Just be in it and see where it leads you.
Want a journaling prompt to help you cultivate downtime? I got you.
Journal Prompt:
Lay Day
If you had a day of freedom, one without any responsibilities or restrictions, what would you do? How would you spend it? Who would you spend it with? Or perhaps you would be by yourself? Maybe you need more time to do absolutely NOTHING?
No need to limit yourself to reality. Fire up your imagination. Maybe you’d go for a stroll on the moon. Or conversely you’d do your taxes to get them off your desk so you can relax. Or / and anything in between including what my friend calls a “duvet day” - when he cocoons up in bed.
Start in the morning and travel through the whole day. Doesn’t have to be written in complete sentences. Give yourself 6 minutes. Then sit back and ask yourself how’d that go? Was it difficult or fun? What did you learn that you need or want?
A photographer friend of mine recently gifted me an image from a series that he took while traveling in Myanmar in 2013. It’s deceptively striking. At first you see a simple, quotidien scene: people on a platform waiting for their train to arrive. But I realized they’re not looking at their phones because they don’t have phones (yet). They’re simply waiting, daydreaming, thinking. I’m old enough to remember what that was like. But seeing it in a photograph startled me because it was remarkably nostalgic, and the picture wasn’t taken very long ago.
Technology is developing at a pace that humanity hasn’t experienced before. Moore’s Law continues to chug along and our brains are playing catch up. John Muir famously said “We need the tonic of wildness.” These days we also need the tonic of quietness.
So for this newsletter instead of including a smattering of resources for you to click through to read / watch / hear, I’m inviting you to do less not more. I challenge you to achieve the novelty of boredom, give your brain a little space to stretch out and relax. Maybe pick up a pen and see what meets you on the page. As always, let me know how it goes and if you need any support.
Speaking of support, each month I offer a complimentary 1:1 Creative Coaching session to an individual via the AllSwell Assistance Program on a first-come, first-serve basis. No strings. No cost. So if you feel you would benefit from a personalized session but it’s beyond your means, please reach out.
Lastly, thank you for your attention and time. I appreciate you reading this and for being part of the AllSwell community.
In Swellness,
Laura
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Photo Credit: Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Hey, friend.
While I am undeniably a summer girl, to paraphrase Nora Ephron there’s something about this time of year that makes me want to buy school supplies. Bring on the Trapper Keeper and ditch the busted flip flops, it’s back to school season.
Regardless of whether you or your kiddos are boarding a yellow bus, the start of the school year feels like a good time to award yourself a clean slate and go learn something. Which is why when I wrote The Deck with Dr. Monisha Vasa, we included this journaling prompt:
“Back to School”
What does that phrase mean to you?
Where does that feeling arise in adulthood?
Try out writing your answer for at least 5 full minutes. And I challenge you to do this without it feeling like…
Because none of the above is true. Unlike school, your journal is for one set of eyes only - your own. No judgements necessary.
After you write it’s a good practice to check in with yourself. What imagery showed up? What feelings emerged? Was it stressful, exciting? Both? Be present to all of it.
Being open to learning new things (particularly complex ones) is a great way to boost neuroplasticity. I am all about staying mentally limber via the brain’s ability to reorganize pathways and even make new neurons - known as “neurogenesis.” It used to be believed that after childhood it was all downhill in the neurogenesis department, but newer research has revealed that our noggins never stop changing in response to learning. This is good news.
The other day I was talking with a friend of mine who is a proper waterman, a truly talented lifelong surfer. His wave knowledge, strength and abilities outpace anything I could hope to accomplish in this lifetime as someone who came to surfing as an adult. I was venting my frustrations about my limitations, telling him that I really wish I were a better surfer. (Whining, basically.)
He said simply, “I wish I were a better surfer, too”
I found that to be such a generous and illuminating statement. It made me realize that there is no destination at which I’ll arrive in my surfing and say, “I’m here - I made it.” On the contrary, it’s likely that I’ll keep pushing myself in new directions stylistically, in more challenging environments or on different kinds of surfcraft.
It’s a convenient analogy -- the balance between attaining levels of mastery and being open, humble as a novice. This reminded me of some wise words from Julia Cameron, the O.G. of journaling:
“Creativity is a spiritual practice. It is not something that can be perfected, finished, and set aside. It is my experience that we reach plateaus of creative attainment only to have a certain restlessness set in. Yes, we are successful. Yes we have made it, but…
In other words, just when we get there, there disappears.”
So we go back to school - for neuroplasticity, for creativity, for life.
In Swellness,
Laura
PS: Below are some resources inspired by the cross-country road trip I recently drove from Maine to Malibu. Hope you’ll find something that will surprise, delight you or plant a seed for you to go explore. It’s pretty great out there.
Photo credit: Roadside Senryu
The Story Behind the Whimsical Road-Sign Poems Popping Up Along America’s Highways
Words as visual art. Check out this story behind the whimsical road-sign poems popping up along America’s highways. In the summer of 2020, an anonymous artist who goes by the name of Roadside Senryu started installing road signs inscribed with poems, a joy for those driving past them and for communities nearby.
12 Dog-Friendly Beaches to Visit in the U.S.
There are few things in life that are more joyful than a dog running on a beach. But it’s not always easy to find dog-friendly sandy spots. Here’s a good list to get you and your furry best friend started.
Photo credit: Garry Miller/Getty
This audiobook got us from Maine to Nebraska, entertained all the way. Multiple people had mentioned to me that McConaughey is a huge proponent of journaling, but it took me until I had long stretches of highway to commit to giving his memoir a listen and I was pleasantly surprised. He gives good story.
Photo Credit: Robin Catinella
The 25 Best Hikes to Beaches in the U.S.
Need to update your bucket list? Two of my favorite activities (hiking and beaching) collide in this article that provides plenty of material for daydreams and IRL plans. Packing list includes: hiking boots and bikinis. Check, check.
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Photo Credit: Daniel Winter
Hello, friend.
How are you doing out there? These have been some bumpy days with a lot of challenging news to process. Feels like we need the emotional equivalent of an all-terrain vehicle. Shock absorbers, anyone? With so much troubling information coming at us it’s easy to shut down and ignore the happenings (hello, toxic positivity) or get demoralized and give up on creating solutions. Neither is a great option.
Instead, what I’m currently practicing is to make space for the rough and the smooth not in turns but simultaneously. To have room for all of it.
To help me do that I created a "Daily Rose" journaling activity - inspired by the roses and thorns conversational prompt - as a way of being present to adversity and beauty within the same day (or sometimes within the same moment).
Daily Rose A mindful writing exercise for uneven times (which, when you really think about it, is most of the time)
It would be a pity to expect “good days” to be wholly unblemished. Similarly even the hardest days have a bit of grace, especially when we're committed to recognizing it. There are usually some petals tucked in there somewhere.
As humans we have incredible emotional nuance and range. Letting our internal life be a large enough container to hold it all - awe, heartbreak, discovery, disappointment, love and grief, thirst and bounty - is both a practice and a gift you’re giving yourself.
By bringing attention to daily blooms and thorns, we are stretching our capacity to be present to the difficulties of our time and take in the enduring sweetness of life. Take it from some of the resources below. Positive change is possible if we can stay inspired.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo credit: Francis Kéré
Ready for some good news? This year architecture’s highest honor, the Pritzker Architecture Prize, was given to Faso-born architect, educator and social activist Francis Kéré. Recognized for “empowering and transforming communities through the process of architecture”, Kéré, the first black architect to ever obtain this award, works mostly in areas charged with constraints and adversity, using local materials and building contemporary facilities whose value exceeds the structure itself, serving and stabilizing the future of entire communities.
Photo credit: Yevgenia Belorusets
On Being with Mary Oliver, “I got saved by the beauty of the world”
Poet Mary Oliver is a balm that soothes even the thorniest wounds. This is an interview with her from the vault and I’ve listened to it no less than 3 times lately while on walks.
Photo credit: Yevgenia Belorusets
Her World Began to Collapse, So She Started Keeping a Diary
If you’re looking for an example of how to stay creatively present during difficult times, here you go. The Ukrainian writer and photographer Yevgenia Belorusets on what it means to make art amidst a war.
Photo Credit: Braylen Dion
3 Science-Backed Ways To Relax In Nature (Even If It's Just Your Local Park)
Speaking of taking walks, some additional encouragement to get outside. It works. Everest not necessary.
]]>Photo Credit: Valentina Muntoni
Hello, friend.
Recently I was in a 1:1 creative coaching session with a client who’d made a big leap forward creatively - away from her established professional direction and towards a fresh, exciting new chapter. But she was in what I call The Vacuum - it’s where dreams stall.
Making profound change doesn’t happen overnight. There’s often this middle territory that can be pretty uncomfortable. You’ve left one shore but you haven’t quite arrived at the next one.
Let’s break this down this step by step…
Right here, this is the critical moment. Not (1) when you made the choice or (2) crafted the vision. Those are important, but frankly they’re comparatively easier. No, The Vacuum is where doubt wants to takes the wheel - and drive you right back to where you started, putting you in park. Staying the course takes grit.
Olivia and George Harrison were married for 23 years - a substantial feat, particularly as rockstar marriages go. Martin Scorcese interviewed the Beatle’s widow in his documentary “George Harrison: Living in the Material World,” and asked her about the secret to a long marriage. Her advice is applicable here: “You don't get divorced.”
Similarly, when people ask me how I’ve managed to be self-employed for over twenty years - during which time I’ve founded two companies and pivoted my ass off - the answer is really simple. You just keep going.
In the meantime, take a look around. Try to find some enjoyment in the process and reasons to celebrate. In the case of the 1:1 client I mentioned earlier, a luxury multi-national hospitality group recently requested a proposal for a permanent installation of her new style of work. When I complimented her on the news, she demured. It wasn’t real yet. Not until the proposal was accepted.
But regardless of the outcome, the request was an important data point, not something to be be minimized or skipped over. I asked, “If I told you 4 months ago that this company would be contacting you for a project on this scale would you have believed me?” No. With her “Vacuum goggles” on she wasn’t seeing that the market is already giving her valuable feedback. And it’s telling her simply: Just. Keep. Going.
If you do, eventually you’ll make it to a new destination. It might not be exactly the one you expected but you’ll be enriched by the experience. And it’s sure a lot more interesting than opting out of the adventure. Need help along the way? I’m here for you.
I hope you’ll find something in the latest Resource Round-Up below that might inspire you to seek out a new shore.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo credit: Getty Images
Stevie Nicks Is Still Living Her Dreams
Some of your favorite Fleetwood Mac songs started as journal entries in the notebooks of Stevie Nicks. The inveterate journaler and rock-and-roll icon talks about her journey through style, spirits, and writing one of her best songs ever.
Photo credit: Legs of Steel/Red Bull Content Pool
When Athletes Dare to Dream like Artists
Creativity isn’t limited to the page or canvas. Professional skier Markus Eder had a fantasy of an impossible descent that would take him across glaciers, through frozen tunnels, into a terrain park, even out of the back of a pickup truck. It made no sense. And yet he found a way to make it happen by thinking more like an artist than an athlete.
Photo Credit: Ashley Barrett
I often espouse sharing your authentic voice, even when it feels uncomfortable (maybe especially when it feels that way). In an effort to walk the talk, here’s a first person essay on finding myself disorientingly, definitively child-free. If it resonates, I wrote it for you.
Photo Credit: Luisa DÖrr
National Geographic
“These Bolivian Skateboarders use Indigenous Attire to Battle Discrimination”
Here’s a visually compelling reminder on how to make a statement that is truest to your nature. These Bolivian Skateboarders lean into their native style to battle discrimination on and off the board.
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Hey, friend.
In this time of collectively riding waves of concern, one variant at a time, I’ve been thinking a lot about the concept of medicine. We say laughter might be the best kind (if so, two doctors are pictured above), though Westerners more typically associate it with curative pills and tonics sold at CVS. But that’s only one perspective.
Edgar Villanueva, author of the excellent and very readable book Decolonizing Wealth: Indigenous Wisdom to Heal Divides and Restore Balance offers a different viewpoint. This denotation sees it taking multiple shapes and showing up in myriad ways:
“In the Indigenous worldview, many kinds of things can be medicine: a place, a word, a stone, an animal, a natural phenomenon, a dream, or a life event like a coffee date with a friend, or even something that seems bad in the moment like the loss of a job. Anyone can find and use medicine, just by allowing your intuition and feelings to determine whether something can serve as medicine.”
If that speaks to you (as it did me), I invite you to explore this idea in the pages of your journal by doing what I call a Medicine Scan. No MRI’s here, it’s painless and you don’t need a copay or an appointment.
Start with a Personal Scan: With Villanueva’s definition in mind, scan your life for a moment of medicine. Where has it shown up lately for you? Maybe it was a specific conversation, moon-gazing or listening to a piece of music with the windows down on your morning drive? Maybe it’s a particular wave during a surf session, or watching a bird only to realize it’s watching you. As Edgar reminds us “Listen for its sacred power; don’t force it.” Be with that experience - How did it affect you, what “curative” power did this medicine have in your life?
Next up, build on that with an External Scan: Take a moment and consider where you have shown up as medicine for someone else. Maybe it was an instance they might not even know about because you did it quietly. Or perhaps it’s more than a single individual - it’s a group, an organization or your whole family. Maybe it was an act of pure friendship or kindness to a complete stranger. Where have you presented as medicine in the world?
If this feels like hubris, I ask you to park that critical voice for now and give yourself over to the exercise. Keep going. What are the elements of “medicine” when you embody it? Is it selfless? Is it kindness? Is it wisdom? Is it generosity? Perhaps it’s when you are your best self. How did it feel?
Medicine certainly seems seasonally appropriate - not in the flu shot sense, because the holidays have arrived. This year my goal is to pay attention in order to appreciate the moments of medicine in my life and to recognize when and how I can possibly show up as medicine for someone else.
Check out some other inspiring things I’ve been reading lately below, including floating saunas and more reasons to do less. It’s always a pleasure to share good stuff I come across with you. Happy holidays, my friend. Here’s to good medicine....
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo credit: Noé Cotter
This floating sauna in Switzerland lets you steam, plunge and repeat
I am a big fan of the healing power of water in all its forms. BIG. Similarly, when design student Trolle Rudebeck Haar spent a year in an exchange program in Helsinki, Finland, he was able to experience the country's sauna culture firsthand. It made such an impact on him that the Lausanne University of Art and Design graduate got a bright idea for his final school project: a prefab sauna that floats on water - in this case Lake Geneva. Just so you know, I am RSVP’ing “yes” to any floating sauna invitations.
Screenshot from: "Hospital of the Future"
An electronic musician’s quest to reimagine hospital soundscapes
Creative inspiration can come from unlikely and even difficult sources. It’s not all walks on country lanes and sunsets. If you’ve ever spent any time at all in a hospital (either yourself or visiting a loved one) you know that it has to be one of the least relaxing places one could possibly heal up. The amount of light and sound 24/7 makes it incredibly difficult to get any proper rest. When sound engineer Yoko Sen fell ill, she was hospitalized for several days. Given her highly attuned ear she quickly realized how the sounds of the hospital and its machines were not serving her healing. It drove her to reimagine the entire auditory experience in hospitals, creating a new aural model for these spaces.
Photo Credit: realfunwow
“Society has progressively increased its demands on us, and with that, therefore, our expectations of what we can or should do,” says Maurizio Fava, the chief of the department of psychiatry at Mass General. “This has led to a quest for greater ‘energy.’ ‘How can I do more? Doctor, what can you give me?’ Want more mojo? Look to the mitochondria. This article sheds light on the fundamental source of our get-up-and go. Note to biohackers: the answer is not more bullet coffee.
Photo Credit: wearenotereallystrangers
The Case For Letting Things Fall Through the Cracks
Speaking of ramped up societal demands, I really enjoyed this interview with author Brian Stulberg about the hedonic treadmill: wanting, striving, achieving, and then, ultimately, finding ourselves falling right back into wanting. He coins this process “heroic individualism” and says its most notable symptoms are a sense of restlessness, a feeling of frenetic energy, and exhaustion. Sound familiar? He makes the case that the cause of this never ending chase—and the burnout it often leads to—is a sense of not-enough-ness. The cure? Do less. Read on to learn more...
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Hey, friend.
If you’re receiving this note, chances are you probably keep a journal or you’re really keen to start. Well, bravo to you. Big step in the right direction. BIG. And if you’re going to make the effort to journal, you might as well get the most out of it, right? Well, I have a super straightforward way for you to up-level your morning journaling game. Do it before you scroll.
I recently suggested this practice to 40 Instagram influencers at an AllSwell workshop I was leading in Malibu and the resulting gasp was audible. I get it; this may sound like a Herculean task. But remember: mobile phones are a relatively new (if highly addictive) technology. Our brains are still playing catch up. As 3-time Pulitzer Prize winning journalist and author Thomas Friedman aptly put it: “Technology is now accelerating at a pace the average human cannot keep up with.” Can I get a show of hands?
The early morning is such a potent and important time. It provides a hugely valuable opportunity to connect to one’s own voice before we go into react-and-respond mode, incorporating the firehose of external messaging coming at us from the average mobile phone. As the OG of journaling Julia Cameron, reminds us:
“...good writing is not the point. Think of your pages like a whisk broom. You stick the broom into all the corners of your consciousness. If you do this first thing in the morning, you are laying out your track for the day. Pages tell you of your priorities. With the pages in place first thing, you are much less likely to fall in with others’ agendas. Your day is your own to spend. You’ve claimed it.”
Claim. Your. Day. Try picking up a pen instead of your phone first thing. Maybe it’s not realistic to ask that of yourself every day. Okay, but at least give it a try and see what happens. Morning sex notwithstanding, choose your own voice before incorporating external opinions.
Here’s some of what has captured my attention in recent weeks -- an article promoting the profound benefits of journaling, an inspired book of interiors, a must-see L.A. art exhibit and my talk with one very rad sommelier. I hope you find something here that helps inspire your own creativity.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo credit: David Paul Morris / Special to the Chronicle
Still Lives, In the Homes of Artists, Great and Unsung
I first met and collaborated with photographer Leslie Williamson years ago in NYC when she released her beautiful book “Handcrafted Modern.” Williamson has a new title in her beautiful series that peeks inside the private spaces of creatives. Ever wondered what the inside of homes of extraordinary artists like Georgia O’Keeffe and Isamu Noguchi looks like? Click through to view her book and find out.
Photo Credit: Myung J. Chun / L.A. Times
Pipilotti Rist’s MOCA Geffen Takeover is a Sensuous Pleasure Trip You Don’t Want to Miss
In her first West Coast show, Pipilotti Rist’s immersive art exhibit combines color, sound, light and video installations at the MOCA. Read the L.A. Times article above to learn more about Rist and her show. If you check it out in person, stop by and grab yourself an AllSwell notebook / The Deck in the MOCA gift shop (they’re carrying our products in conjunction with the exhibit - how cool is that?!).
Photo Credit: Lauren Segal
Breakfast Wine with Sommelier Eric Moorer
“Natural wine” is definitely having a buzzy moment, but it does make me wonder—have I been drinking unnatural wine until now? I was able to address this deep question when I sat down with Eric Moorer, sommelier for the D.C.-based natural wine purveyor Domestique. He spilled beans on how he evades hangovers, whether natural wine is actually good for us (I asked with fingers crossed), that funkiness quotient, shifting diversity in the wine world, and more. Pour yourself a glass and join the conversation, the latest installment of “Campfire Conversations,” my column for Whalebone Magazine in which I interview disruptive change-makers for good.
Photo Credit: Robbie Spencer
What’s All This About Journaling?
Nearly 8 years ago I founded AllSwell with a simple mission, to invite more people to the page so they could derive the benefits of journaling. Admittedly, I was a bit early. It’s taken the wellness zeitgeist a while to swing in this general direction but that seems to be changing. I’ve repeatedly said, “Journaling is the new meditation, which was the new yoga.” About ten people forwarded me this article when it ran in The New York Times and I have to say I feel pretty darn vindicated. Check it out at the link below and learn more about the benefits you can derive by the simple act of putting pen to paper, including boosting mindfulness, memory and communication skills to improving your sleep and immune system.
]]>Photo credit: Bruce Webber
Hey, friend.
One of the top things I repeatedly hear in 1:1 creative coaching sessions is some form of imposter syndrome. It can come in different guises, but it’s essentially the same beast; “I might not be good enough” is the general gist.
Expressing ourselves doesn’t always come easily. There’s risk involved. It’s a lot safer to stay quiet. I know, I used to be the girl-behind-the-girl working (successfully) in marketing and PR. I liked it back there, behind a public figure. Why? Because it was rewarding to support the work of others, yes. But it also kept me from being seen and potentially judged. I didn’t have to put my voice on the line - until I launched AllSwell 8 years ago.
Even then it took a while for me to step out from behind the brand and wave hello. Initially, I wrote all of the AllSwell content in the “we” versus “I” to avoid authorship, used product images rather than any photos of myself (I loathed having my picture taken) and avoided video entirely. “Nobody likes a show-off” is a toxic piece of programming that I had been playing in my head on repeat for decades. I didn’t find a magic delete button for that message, but I’ve repeatedly busted through these blocks in order to deliver what I knew could help others - the simple yet powerful act of putting pen to paper.
I had to get over myself in order to be of service. As part of AllSwell’s ethos, I was asking others to claim their voice, which would be a complete sham unless I was willing to do the same. Gulp. It’s been an iterative process - one that continues to this day - but here I am, increasingly comfortable with doing the uncomfortable.
And from the other side of the chasm, what I have to say to anyone stuck in the imposter syndrome feedback loop is this: stop being so stingy with your good sh*t. Stop bogarting your wisdom. If you have a story to tell, an insight you’ve learned, something inside you that is looking for a way out into the world, into the light - then get out of the way and share it.
Stories are medicine. A reader / listener / viewer may see themselves, validated and reflected, in the process. It could save someone a lot of time and effort feeling their way around in the dark because you were courageous enough to offer up a door or a window. Your experience may feel unique to you, but chances are it’s probably going to connect with someone out there. Most truths are like that.
How many times have I read a sentence or paragraph that illuminated the way forward? Or heard a song that so utterly captured my experience that I felt seen? Or witnessed a piece of art that inspired me, lifted me up and out of the humdrum to new heights of the sublime? More times than I can count. And yes, in some instances it was the work of wildly famous and established creatives, but just as often it’s been a sentence from a self-published book by an author whose name I might not even remember, or a post on Medium from someone who was brave enough to state their gospel.
Scary? Heck, yeah. But also hugely satisfying. You never know who you might help, but I can pretty much guarantee that you’ll also be helping yourself in the process. No imposters in this zip code. Just authentic humans taking some chances.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo credit: Heather Favell
Resource: The Photographer Who Set Out To Watch Herself Age
Summary: Nancy Floyd's new book, “Weathering Time,” captures a nearly four decade long self-documentation project that began in the early eighties. Her book represents a collection of anti-perfectionist self-portraits that provide a compelling authentic snapshot into her personal life.
Photo Credit: Hulu
WATCH: McCartney 3, 2, 1
Summary: Hearing two living legends (Rick Rubin and Sir Paul McCartney) in dialogue is made straight up delightful by McCartney’s energetic telling of the stories behind songs we all know by heart. That said, it’s Rubin’s fan-girl puppy dog eyes that really make this next-level enjoyable. Everybody is somebody’s fan.
Photo Credit: Paul Newman and Robert Redford in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
LISTEN: The Conversational Nature Of Reality
Summary: Speaking of bromances...David Whyte’s love and use of language is palpable in this interview, but it’s his description of his long standing bromance with the late Irish philosopher John O’Donohue that could bring a tear to your eye. They were, David Whyte says, like “two bookends.” More recently, he’s written about the consolation, nourishment, and underlying meaning of everyday words. Plus hearing him read his poetry out loud might make you pull over just to take in all that beauty. Listen in and enjoy.
Photo Credit: Khaite
READ: Digital Minimalism
Summary: We know it’s not realistic to go full on luddite. (Besides which, life before GPS wasn’t so great. If we never have to fold a map again, it’s okay.) But there’s a tipping point at which our digital connectivity stops serving us and it’s just diminishing returns there on out. Check out this interesting take on how to selectively slim down our tech use without giving up the parts that are actually helpful and practical.
]]>At AllSwell we believe in the day-changing power of music. We specifically tailor playlists to accompany our mindful writing workshop experiences (digital and in real life) to help inspire participants. In honor of both Mental Health Awareness Month, as well as AAPI Awareness Month, AllSwell founder Laura Rubin asked renowned DJ and surfer Mei Kwok a bunch of questions about how she supports her mental well-being via music. Listen in to the conversation, and check out the custom “feel good” ALLSWELL X MEI KWOK playlist while you’re at it.
First of all, Miss Kwok, do you prefer Mei or May? We’ve seen you referred to as both in print and want to be sure to get it right.
Mei, please! It’s my real name. I went by May all my life because I wasn't living my truth as a true Asian American. I suppressed myself for years to feel accepted. I went back to Mei this year at the beginning of the Black Lives Matter movement.
Mei it is! Thank you for creating a feel-good playlist for the AllSwell community. I’ve road-tested it already and can vouch for it’s mood-boosting abilities. As a DJ, music is clearly a big part of your life. What role does music play in supporting your well-being and, more specifically, your mental state?
Music plays a huge part in my overall wellness. It has an energizing effect, so your mood naturally improves. Listening to music also releases dopamine and serotonin into the brain, helping you relax and stay focused.
I use music to set the mood for my AllSwell writing workshops. How is music a part of your routine for self-care? And how do you recommend our readers/followers replicate these routines in their own lives?
I’m a new driver (I’m from New York City!) and I’ve been really enjoying going for long drives on the PCH blasting my favorite playlists and singing (or screaming) along. It makes me happy, especially driving on such a beautiful, scenic road.
Road trip! Okay, since it’s AAPI awareness month - as well as mental health awareness month - what are some of the organizations and individuals you feel are helping to shift the cultural conversation around these critically important issues? What steps do you want to see the public at-large taking?
My friends Philip Lim, Prabal Gurung and Gia Kuan have really stepped up and used their voice to support the AAPI community. I’m proud to call them acquaintances. There are also so many organizations helping our community, too. For more information check out:
We’re all so digitally connected in the wake of the pandemic. As a public figure, how and when do you take time to unplug?
I have to admit I am totally addicted to my phone and social media because it’s been integrated into my life. When I am forced to be without my phone (i.e. when I surf) it really cleanses me, helps me stay present, enjoy the ocean and the waves.
As a fellow New Yorker turned LA-resident, what does each location represent to you?
New York City will forever be my home, I am so connected to the city, energy and culture, plus my family is there. I crave NYC when I'm away for an extended period of time. LA also feels like home now - like a perma-vacation. The atmosphere and coastline is just breathtaking. Being back in my Venice neighborhood automatically makes me feel zen.
I love being bi-coastal. I recognize not everyone can have this option and I'm grateful for it
I can certainly relate to that! Each place provides something different and special. Speaking of special places, how did you find your way to the ocean? And what role does surfing play in your life?
I grew up in New York City so being by the ocean was never really an option for me. I would read surf magazines/blogs and I idolized surfers and wanted to be one. I decided seven years ago that I’d take a lesson in Rockaway. I ended up loving the experience and kept at it, eventually living in Rockaway seasonally, opening a business there and traveling the world to chase waves.
As someone whose job revolves around collaborating and socializing, how do you create space for solitude? What are some daily or weekly rituals you use to support your mental health / mood?
I always take time for myself whether it's going for a long run (I’m currently training for a half marathon in Malibu this November!), surfing or strength training. Or sometimes I just lay in bed and read or watch Netflix and literally not answer ANYONE.
You are involved in many creative pursuits from your DJ-ing career to your pop-up shop, “The Notion” and other collaborations. What are some practices or tools that you utilize to remain creative while being involved in multiple projects?
Yes, I opened a women's surf & swim pop-up shop in the summer of 2015 in Rockaway Beach. It was such an energizing experience to create something I was passionate about. And women are not as recognized in surf culture so it was great to create a space for female surfers. I received amazing feedback as well as press coverage -- It was featured in Vogue, W Magazine, The New York Times, etc.
I’m a natural manifestor and I love to work on creative projects that I have a personal connection to. When something feels good in my gut, I just go with my instincts. Always trust your intuition.
What / who / where is inspiring you right now?
I am currently in Playa La Saladita in Mexico on a solo surf trip so this ocean and surf break is what's inspiring me!
Listen to the ALLSWELL X MEI KWOK Playlist here.
]]>Photo credit: Joan Smalls by Karl Lagerfeld
Hello, friend.
It’s been a bit since I delivered a Resource Round-Up. Frankly, I didn’t think anyone needed to be looking at a screen for even a single moment more. But now I’m feeling something else, something that resembles “being inspired” again (!!!). And wow, it’s good to be back. I hope you’re feeling a shift, too.
Recently someone asked me if I thought that we’d stay in a heightened state of appreciation or if we would backslide, eventually bemoaning traffic and the usual frustrations. My answer? In my experience, the human condition tends to drive us to level-set after a while. We get used to whatever is normal - in part as a sophisticated coping mechanism.
I felt this way years ago after the trauma of being seriously ill. I thought I’d never take a single moment of my life for granted again. But actually I did find my way back to some semblance of normalcy, and that’s not a bad thing. I wouldn’t be able to put air in my tires let alone floss my teeth if I lived in a constant state of palpable exaltation. Down girl.
As I healed, rather than an immediate big, dramatic shift, what occurred were more subtle, deeper changes over time. My values shifted and a new set of coordinates emerged. They showed up gradually and eventually brought me here to you.
During that time, I wrote a lot. As a way of bearing witness to the events in my own life, for after-the-fact processing (i.e. “Wait, what the hell just happened??”) and slowly mapping out what might come next.
With that in mind, I hope you’ll consider doing the same because: putting pen to paper works. It also helps maintain the welcome sense of appreciation many of us are now feeling. You’ve earned this, so let’s try to weave that good stuff into life as we move forward.
And please check out the latest crop of resources below. There might be something that will float your boat and make your hardworking brain happy.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo Credit: Joy Cho
Creative people sleep more, later and less well
Are you a visual or verbal creative? Have you ever thought to ask yourself that question? Well, depending on which type of creative you may be, a new study found that sleep quality correlates directly to your answer. This further strengthens the hypothesis that creativity is not a uniform concept, it has different psycho-biological expressions. Find out more at the link above and you may learn a little something about yourself.
Photo Credit: Cha McCoy
4 Black Sommeliers Share Their Perfect Pour And How The Industry Is Changing
In an industry that is overwhelmingly homogeneous, Kristin Braswell highlights Black sommeliers, interviews them about some of their favorite bottles and how they hope the wine industry can be more inclusive. We’ll drink to that.
Photo Credit: Illustrations by Alessandra Olanow
This past year has been full of unexpected change and loss. Alessandra Olanow shares her wise and witty illustrations, providing valuable inspiration to those of us who need a reference point during disorienting times. Nearly every page reveals an “oh, I feel that” moment. Fun fact: Long before she was an Instagram sensation, Alex created the AllSwell logo and designed the illustrations for our first two notebooks.
Photo credit: Ashley Barrett
Meet Laura Rubin: Journaling Expert, Creative Coach, Founder Of AllSwell Creative
If you’re an entrepreneur (or thinking about becoming one) check out this interview with our founder Laura Rubin about her professional journey, which includes plenty of humbling moments, as well as successes. And see her list of favorite LA resources to spend an ideal day with an out-of-towner. But why wait for a visitor? Be your own guest.
Photo credit: @BVBSLC
A Once-In-A-Lifetime Chance To Start Over
If it’s time for you to dream up what your post-pandemic world looks like, check out this article in The Atlantic. It outlines helpful pen-to-paper exercises to help you discover the activities and habits you want to keep - and those that you don’t.
Photo Credit: James Chester
The Oldest Productivity Trick Around
While social media has turned the checkmark into a status symbol, this author is reclaiming it as an effective analog tool. If you’re looking for a simple, yet powerful technique to improve your daily productivity, check this story out. (Sorry, I couldn’t resist.)
Photo Credit: Alexis Toumazis
What Will Our Brains Be Like Post COVID-19?
This article asserts that we have each been on our own hero’s journey this past year, and that our brains can emerge better for it via post-traumatic growth. To achieve this state, Dr. Tara Swart suggests journaling–or voice / video journaling–to help release troubling thoughts and reinforce positive messaging. Learn how at the link above.
Photo Credit: Pepi de Boissieu
It’s official: we have cooked every single one of our “usual suspect” recipes to-death. Coming across this chic little cookbook performed a miracle. It actually reignited our desire to reenter the kitchen and create. And it’s veggie-centric which feels reassuringly virtuous.
]]>Photo credit: Bruce Weber
Hey, friend.
A couple of years ago Whalebone Magazine invited me to participate in their annual Interview Issue, giving me free reign to pick anyone of substance that I’d been longing to barrage with questions. I enthusiastically chose adventurous reporter and best-selling author Susan Casey, whose books and articles have been a touchstone for me - shining a light down the path of pursuing with passion and curiosity what interests me most. If you’re not familiar with her impeccably researched books, I almost envy you the pleasure of discovering them for the first time.
A rather painful part of the editorial process is paring back what doesn’t fit into the story. And in the case of my conversation with Susan, there were a few elements of the interview that didn’t make their way into the final published article but have nonetheless stuck with me. I recently went back and reread the original transcript to capture the exact words and bring one of these gems to you:
“If there's something that haunts you, like if there's a picture of some location, If there's something that you can't get out of your mind, a body of water that calls to you, then I say go there. That was the way it was for me with the Farallons, that was the way it was when I first saw a giant wave. Somebody said to me, ‘There's a difference between seeing a picture of something and then chartering a boat.’ Yeah, but there's no rule that says that you can't look at a picture of something and then go charter a boat and go out there. It's only your own permission that you need to do something like that, so give yourself the permission. If it's an aquatic environment, go swimming in it, go surfing in it, go see it. Go learn more about it, but do go.”
I love this glimpse into Casey’s creative process and how curiosity - paying attention to those things which have more resonance - is a crucial element.
We aren’t all going to be badass writer-reporters like Susan Casey, and we don’t need to be. Actually, you don’t need to have any desired outcome at all. Explore for the sake of exploration. Learn for the sake of learning. (BTW: learning is really good for the neuroplasticity of our brains, especially as we age. Keep that grey matter supple, baby.) See where it takes you, not for any specific outcome or for monetization but for the enjoyment of following the breadcrumbs.
That said, what I’ve witnessed repeatedly in my experience as a creative coach is when my brave and wise clients free themselves up to explore a subject that speaks to them - without any expectation of expertise or an attachment to productivity - a really useful outcome eventually emerges. A new business model comes into focus; a different way of seeing their work is revealed; a creative project suddenly takes shape. Transformation occurs. It probably didn’t happen in a straight line, but suddenly: There. It. Is.
At present, our logistical ability to hop on a seaplane and check out a far-flung location is limited. And under the best of circumstances we don’t all have the resources readily available for similar pursuits. But you needn’t be prevented from diving into whatever topic is whispering into your ear. On the contrary, I’ve found that having less time on the road has provided me with more bandwidth for subjects that have been tugging at me - many of which are represented in this dose of AllSwell’s Resource Roundup below.
I hope you’ll find something here that piques your interest. Whatever it is, do as Susan would have us do: investigate further.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo Credit: Zachary Murray / Big Mongolia Travel
It’s never too late to pursue a new dream. Barbara Hillary, a retired nurse and community activist in Queens, embodies that. At seventy-five years old she became the first Black woman on record to reach the North Pole. Read her story here…
Photo Credit: Celia Galpin
She Surf, The Rise of Female Surfing by Lauren L. Hill
Remember when - not so long ago - pretty much the only imagery we saw of women in the pages of surf magazines were photos of ladies lounging on the beach in bikinis or shot from behind while paddling out? Well, happily those days are over and for those of us who still have a slight hangover from the experience, this book is an antidote. Not only is it chock full of heroic imagery celebrating the grace and power of female surfers, Hill takes a deep dive into the story of how women are shaping surfing culture.
Photo Credit: Tony Caramanico
New Study Suggest Handwriting Engages The Brain More Than Typing
Not surprisingly, we’re big proponents of analog expression. In a new study, researchers found that handwriting and drawing engaged the brain far more than typing on a keyboard. We feel more than a little vindicated. The neural connections involved in handwriting also prove beneficial in activation patterns of learning, as well. User-friendly takeaway: if you want to learn something, jot down your notes rather than typing them.
Photo credit: Susan Casey
How Iceman Wim Hof Uncovered the Secrets to Our Health
Reported by one of our writing heroes Susan Casey (see note above from our founder about her), this article follows the “Ice Man” in and out of some seriously chilly water. “It’s now documented in peer-reviewed papers that, among other things, Hof may be able to turn on at will his body’s tap of opiates and cannabinoids—euphoria-inducing chemicals that provide natural pain relief and an overall sense of well-being. What’s more, Hof insists, if he can do this, so can the rest of us.” Learn how by following the link.
Photo credit: Jean Michel Basquiat at Yanna’s nail salon, August 29, 1983, by Andy Warhol.
Talking Heads’ frontman David Byrne asks, “What are we without human interaction?” Reducing day-to-day human friction seems like a good idea (less waiting in line at the bank, for instance) but does it actually increase our quality of life? “We do not exist as isolated individuals’ yet technology immerses us more and more in convenience that reduces meaningful human interaction.” If you are in any way nostalgic for time spent browsing through racks at a record store, you’ll really enjoy Byrne’s perspective in this article he penned for M.I.T. Technology Review.
Photo Credit: Unnur film still, director Chris Burkard
Have 17 minutes? Treat yourself to this beautiful morsel of visual storytelling. Directed by celebrated outdoor photographer Chris Burkard, Unnur captures the powerful bond between father and daughter through time spent outdoors - in this case, stunning rural Iceland.
Photo Credit: Unknown
“Trauma is a fact of life,” but healing is also a part of it. Leading trauma expert, Bessel van der Kolk, shows in this influential book how we can reactivate areas of our brain - including pleasure and engagement - that are negatively affected by traumatic events through techniques including movement, neurofeedback, bodywork and (you guessed it) putting pen to paper. “Writing experiments from around the world, with grade school students, nursing home residents, medical students, maximum-security prisoners, arthritis sufferers, new mothers...consistently show that writing about upsetting events improves physical and mental health.” This book isn’t an easy read, but it’s well worth it.
Photo Credit: Gather film still, director Sanjay Rawal
A “critics pick” by The New York Times, this lushly shot feature-length documentary film investigates the experience of first nation people in the context of a unique lens: the culture of food - raising, gathering, cooking, researching and consuming it in community. Gather weaves together multiple intimate stories with archival footage as it contextualizes the Native American experience. A timely watch with Thanksgiving rapidly approaching.
]]>Photo credit: Natalie Portman in Hotel Chevalier, film by Wes Anderson
Hey, friend.
It’s getting dark outside earlier with the shift of season, and it also seems to be getting dark inside for many of us as the negative news and related real-life challenges accumulate. I do not turn a blind eye - I read, listen and take action. That said, I also invest heavily in joy, creativity, natural beauty and rest.
In what feels like a challenging time on multiple levels, my perspective is that bringing light into the world is an act of radical resistance. I won’t allow myself to get depleted to the point of helplessness, and I’ll do what I can to lighten the hearts of others while I’m at it. Because if I’m lying on the bathroom floor immobilized by grief, I can’t support myself let alone anyone else creating positive change.
Lately I’ve actually heard folks apologize for being okay. It is not wrong to be “well.” Thank your lucky-ass stars and please do not feel guilty about it. More like, sing “Hallelujah, amen” and do a happy dance. Then help those who are definitely not-okay where and how you can.
Looking for upsides? I’ve got a really good one for you: the timely death of hustle culture. This year so many of us have had to slow our roll -- no more rushing around town to meetings, hopping on planes for presentations, or even stacking social engagements in an effort to please people. Additionally, our ability to focus has been greatly diluted, so bye-bye multi-tasking. We are being forced to be more thoughtful with how we’re applying our limited resources. But this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it’s just different.
Slowing down doesn’t mean you’re a slacker. On the contrary it might make you even more effective and creative, as you’ll learn in this round of The AllSwell Round-Up. I hope you’ll find something here to help you reevaluate how you’re spending your time. Take breaks, daydream, catch 40 winks. Go easy, my friend.
In Swellness,
Laura
Photo Credit: Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s, film by Blake Edwards
You Really Don’t Need to Work so Much
Busy doesn’t equal important, as this article debunks. “Some people think that Americans just prefer work to leisure; a strong work ethic, according to this theory, has become a badge of honor for anyone with a college degree. If you’re busy, you seem important.” Read on to learn more about working less.
Photo Credit: Courtney Rizzoli
“Aperitivo: The Cocktail Culture of Italy” by Marisa Huff
Nobody does “slow” more stylishly than the Italians. This is where the Slow Food movement was born and they know a thing or two about prioritizing pleasure, taking time to linger and enjoy. The aperitivo hour is the perfect embodiment of this ethos. “Although predinner drinking occurs everywhere from paris to Poughkeepsie, it is in Italy that this social tradition has been raised to an art form.” Organized by region, this diverting book is a beautiful exploration of tasty little bites and the drinks to enjoy alongside them.
Photo Credit: Unknown
Writers on Creativity in Quarantine
Writer Mary H.K. Choi on how her creative process has shifted to a slower pace (for the better, we’ll say) as a result of the pandemic: “I no longer write as if being chased by a pack of wild dogs. There used to be so much urgency. If I didn’t get my thoughts down, I was scared they’d evaporate and crop-dust someone else who’d get to claim them. It was always zero sum with me, or that scarcity mentality. A lot of that energy has dissipated. The truth is I’m in grief and that makes me prone to depressive waves so everything is going much slower.” No wild dogs necessary.
Photo credit: Tricia Hersey
For The Wild: Tricia Hersey on Rest as Resistance
It would be ironic to say that this podcast pretty much woke us up to the importance of rest, but it also wouldn’t be wrong. In the midst of grind culture, Tricia Hersey calls on us all to reclaim our bodies and take a beat - especially people of color. You can keep your #bossbabe kudos; we’ll take a nap.
Photo credit: Indigo Contemporary
Surfer, champion of ecopsychology, all around “conscious creative” (and 1:1 AllSwell coaching client) Lex Weinstein asked our founder Laura Rubin to participate in a conversation about what happens when rest and creativity are thwarted by the expectant grip of productivity. They explored how we can shift our addiction to results into a space that celebrates the mysterious in-between places. These two got real. Listen in and learn to embrace the process...
Photo Credit: Jeremy Koreski
Kiss the Ground (movie trailer)
We’re counting down the days to watch this documentary film about dirt (coming out on Netflix, September 22nd). Why? Because the movie trailer was that good and we could all use a little empowering news on the climate change front. Dirt might just save us all.
Photo Credit: Stellene Volandes
“How to Do Nothing: Resisting the Attention Economy” by Jenny Odell
“Nothing is harder to do than nothing. In a world where our value is determined by our productivity, many of us find our every last minute captured, optimized, or appropriated as a financial resource by the technologies we use daily,” starts this audiobook by artist and critic Jenny Odell. Our attention is perhaps our greatest (and most easily squandered) resource and Odell makes a well-laid out case for reclaiming it. The audiobook format is great for a long drive but if you prefer to read it on the page, we’re big fans of ink on paper.
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